Posts by Funny Guy, Author at The Perfect Joke - Page 2 of 5
A guy sticks his head round the door of the barbershop and asks, ‘How long before I can get a haircut? The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, ‘About 2 hours’, ‘OK’ said the guy and left. A few days later, the same guy stuck his head round the door
To celebrate the 30th anniversary of Viz Comic we are publishing the first part of our Viz Top Tips.
A man who just died is taken to the local mortuary. He is wearing an very expensive and high quality tailored blue suit.
Bill walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged standing at the counter enthusiastically writing addresses on bright pink envelopes covered with hearts. He then takes out a scent bottle and starts spraying perfume over them. Bill’s curiosity gets the better of him and he walks over to the man and asks […]
Jose approaches the Mexican border on his bicycle. Hanging from his shoulders he has two large, bulky bags. The border patrol guard stops him and says, “Hey mister what ya gotÂ in those bags?” “Just sand,” replied Jose.
Young Simon was walking around his localÂ supermarketÂ picking up a few items forÂ his evening meal when he noticed an old lady was following him.Â He tried to ignore her butÂ everyÂ direction he went she followed.Â
Bill catches a taxi home one evening and the cabbie charges him almost double the usual fare and when Bill complains he becomes abusive. Bill resolves to get his revenge if he comes across this taxi driver again.
A burglar breaks into a house and is quietly and expertly collecting valuables in his bag when he hears a voice: “Jesus is watching you.”
One evening as Jack passed little Tommyâ€™s bedroom he overheard his son praying, “God bless Mummy, God bless Daddy, and God bless Grandma. Bye bye Grandpa.” The Dad wasnâ€™t quite sure what Tommy meant by this, but was pleased to see his son praying.
Three girl friends have met up for their weekly meal together and are discussing their relationships. One of them is engaged, one is a mistress and the other is married.